Becoming Invisible

By Will Seagers

 

In other blogs I have mentioned the transition "into" the porn industry. This happened as my looks started to develop in a positive way and men became interested is seeing me... all of me! And, this includes the porn industry, too.

 

Will Seagers modeling portrait trio

 

This was a bit of a shock when all of this first started because I always thought that in my adolescence I was sort of awkward looking, to say the least. During high school, I thought the occasional trick was a charity fuck. Not too much self esteem there, eh?

Well, well, well! It was just after high school and into my first year at engineering school that my good old hormones (and looks) kicked in and things were in for a change... for the better. I started to lift weights, take vitamins and pay attention to how I squeezed myself into those lovely and popular "bell-bottoms" of the time. The family jewels were well displayed in those jeans as well as the good old 501s.

OK. So I had established a formula for getting myself laid as well as getting some pretty good jobs along the way. Of course, while hunting for jobs, the family jewels thing was toned down and replaced by a new desire to be "fashionable." Ha. I remembered getting myself all gussied up in a great Pierre Cardin tweed suit and parading my tush over to NYC to the Eastern Airlines building to apply as a Steward. I got the job. It was funny - I asked to hold the interview in French and that went over quite well! Bien sûr!

This pattern of looking good and saying the right thing (in the right language) went on for years as the formula for getting the jobs and men! Once firmly in the porn biz, I had a very good fifteen year run. BTW, I usually held down a decent selling job at the same time while keeping my screen persona on the Q.T.!

 

Will Seagers modeling nudes

 

Things really didn't change much on the attraction meter until my 60s. Yes. I said my 60s. I know, it even seemed uncanny to me that during my late 40s and all throughout my 50s the magic was still there. I have described in prior blogs about "The Beach" and luring many men. I just left out that I was almost old enough to be their father! Ha!

 

Two snapshots of Will Seagers

 

Then POW! The 60s hit. I know, I guess I shouldn't complain - I had a great run! But, it was as if I wasn't even there any more... no more turned heads, unwanted stares and the like.

Boy! When age caught up with me - it didn't fool around. It was like someone flipped a switch! First prostate cancer at age 60, then countless bouts of skin cancer... like the one from which I am currently recovering. Ouch! But, all that aside, I thought there was some niche for a noble looking older guy like myself. Towards the end of my 60s I came to the realization that les jeux sont faits - the game was up.

 

Will Seagers contemporary photo

 

I love writing these blogs. They give me the chance to relive my memories and an extraordinary live - for which I have no regrets - except becoming invisible.

 

Thank you to Will Seagers for use of his photos.

 

 

Bio of Will Seagers:

Will Seagers (also credited as Matt Harper), within his multifaceted career and participation in numerous gay communities across the country in the '70s and '80s and beyond, worked as a print model and film performer. He made iconic appearances in releases from Falcon, Hand in Hand, Joe Gage, Target (Bullet), J. Brian, Steve Scott, and more, including in lead roles in major classics like Gage's L.A. Tool & Die (1979) and Scott's Wanted (1980). He brought strong screen presence and exceptional acting to his roles and was scene partners with many fellow legends of classic porn.

 

Will Seagers, present day image

 


You can read Will Seagers' previous blogs for Bijou here:
Welcome Matt/Will
What's For Dessert?
On and Off the Set of L.A. Tool & Die
Wanted, Weekend Lockup and Weekends in Hermosa Beach
Honeymoon in the Palms
Birds of a Feather
The Stereo Maven of Castro Street
The Pass Around Boy
The Ecstasy and the Agony
Fitness and Fantasy: The Early Gyms
Chasing the Boys and Chasing the Sun: My Story of Sun Worship and Where It Got Me

 

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Madame Bubby Is Damn Mad: Ageism in the Gay Community

Madame Bubby Is Damn Mad: Ageism in the Gay Community

Recently posted on craigslist, missed connections: 

Thursday night it was the backyard at Manhandler. You were sucking guys off with your shirt off. You smoked a lot. That's nasty by the way. You seemed to be in my proximity or in my face the whole time I was there. You were inside fucking with your tired little cell phone (probably seeking even more cum from the web) and I got a good look at your face in the light. No wonder you lurk around dark sex venues. You are at least 55, maybe 60, wrinkled, fugly, and that Sean Hayes hairstyle has GOT to go. Please, do us all a favor, and take the summer off from sex. Don't come to water sports parties or bear naked or anything else. Stay home, or whatever the fuck. And the next time you try to elbow your way into the middle of my sex with someone, I'm going to give you a swift kick into your dried up decayed little balls. You know who you are, the one who looks like Jack from Will and Grace, and wears that ridiculous half-lopsided little harness thing sometimes. Go pickle yourself, hon. 
 

Manhandler Saloon

Reply to the above: OMG I know exactly who you're describing. He is everywhere!!!! And so rude and will try to horn in on your action. He needs to stay home for about 20 years until sex no longer matters lol. 

I am damn mad. I understand the poster's need to vent on one level, but I actually felt sorry for the person this individual was complaining about. 

I wasn't surprised by the poster's crass materialism (”tired little cellphone”) and of course, obviously, the insults about the person's age and physical appearance. Such unabated viciousness seems to be common these days in a culture of narcissism and entitlement. 

And let's face it: these have always been problems with ageism in the gay community, as well as the rampant discrimination against those who don't possess an ideally perfect youthful body. Even in vintage Hollywood, an actress over 35 was over the hill. 

And the prejudice against age and those who don't match up to certain physical standards has escalated in a world where sex is available on a phone app, bodies can be photoshopped, and Kim Kardashian is a role model. 
 

Gay body issues

 

Regarding the reason for the vent, I do understand the etiquette about not “horning” in on public sex scenes, but rather than posting something so hurtful anonymously (the coward's way out), how about speaking kindly to the person and perhaps explaining the etiquette, for a start? 

(But then, in the middle of a circle jerk, counseling might not come to mind.)
Hairy stomach face circle of hell


As I said above, I feel deeply sorry for this person who was the target of such vitriol. Loneliness … sexual addiction … who knows what drives this person to behave this way? I think his fate is the fate of so many unattached older gay men, many of whom don't know how to develop relationships (or, even more sadly, they could be lonely survivors of the AIDS epidemic of the eighties) because their only exposure to gay life was “dark sex venues,” which before today's environment of acceptance, were often the only places a gay person could connect? 
 

And finally, to the person who posted this: Who are you to judge? You also seem to frequent these “dark sex venues.” I don't think I would be wrong in predicting that you will be that person in about twenty years. Karma's a bitch, bitch! 

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