Becoming Invisible

By Will Seagers

 

In other blogs I have mentioned the transition "into" the porn industry. This happened as my looks started to develop in a positive way and men became interested is seeing me... all of me! And, this includes the porn industry, too.

 

Will Seagers modeling portrait trio

 

This was a bit of a shock when all of this first started because I always thought that in my adolescence I was sort of awkward looking, to say the least. During high school, I thought the occasional trick was a charity fuck. Not too much self esteem there, eh?

Well, well, well! It was just after high school and into my first year at engineering school that my good old hormones (and looks) kicked in and things were in for a change... for the better. I started to lift weights, take vitamins and pay attention to how I squeezed myself into those lovely and popular "bell-bottoms" of the time. The family jewels were well displayed in those jeans as well as the good old 501s.

OK. So I had established a formula for getting myself laid as well as getting some pretty good jobs along the way. Of course, while hunting for jobs, the family jewels thing was toned down and replaced by a new desire to be "fashionable." Ha. I remembered getting myself all gussied up in a great Pierre Cardin tweed suit and parading my tush over to NYC to the Eastern Airlines building to apply as a Steward. I got the job. It was funny - I asked to hold the interview in French and that went over quite well! Bien sûr!

This pattern of looking good and saying the right thing (in the right language) went on for years as the formula for getting the jobs and men! Once firmly in the porn biz, I had a very good fifteen year run. BTW, I usually held down a decent selling job at the same time while keeping my screen persona on the Q.T.!

 

Will Seagers modeling nudes

 

Things really didn't change much on the attraction meter until my 60s. Yes. I said my 60s. I know, it even seemed uncanny to me that during my late 40s and all throughout my 50s the magic was still there. I have described in prior blogs about "The Beach" and luring many men. I just left out that I was almost old enough to be their father! Ha!

 

Two snapshots of Will Seagers

 

Then POW! The 60s hit. I know, I guess I shouldn't complain - I had a great run! But, it was as if I wasn't even there any more... no more turned heads, unwanted stares and the like.

Boy! When age caught up with me - it didn't fool around. It was like someone flipped a switch! First prostate cancer at age 60, then countless bouts of skin cancer... like the one from which I am currently recovering. Ouch! But, all that aside, I thought there was some niche for a noble looking older guy like myself. Towards the end of my 60s I came to the realization that les jeux sont faits - the game was up.

 

Will Seagers contemporary photo

 

I love writing these blogs. They give me the chance to relive my memories and an extraordinary live - for which I have no regrets - except becoming invisible.

 

Thank you to Will Seagers for use of his photos.

 

 

Bio of Will Seagers:

Will Seagers (also credited as Matt Harper), within his multifaceted career and participation in numerous gay communities across the country in the '70s and '80s and beyond, worked as a print model and film performer. He made iconic appearances in releases from Falcon, Hand in Hand, Joe Gage, Target (Bullet), J. Brian, Steve Scott, and more, including in lead roles in major classics like Gage's L.A. Tool & Die (1979) and Scott's Wanted (1980). He brought strong screen presence and exceptional acting to his roles and was scene partners with many fellow legends of classic porn.

 

Will Seagers, present day image

 


You can read Will Seagers' previous blogs for Bijou here:
Welcome Matt/Will
What's For Dessert?
On and Off the Set of L.A. Tool & Die
Wanted, Weekend Lockup and Weekends in Hermosa Beach
Honeymoon in the Palms
Birds of a Feather
The Stereo Maven of Castro Street
The Pass Around Boy
The Ecstasy and the Agony
Fitness and Fantasy: The Early Gyms
Chasing the Boys and Chasing the Sun: My Story of Sun Worship and Where It Got Me

 

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Chasing the Boys and Chasing the Sun: My Story of Sun Worship and Where It Got Me

By Will Seagers

 

Summer has always been my favorite time of the year. Bathing suits, bulges, boys and of course a good suntan! Growing up on the East Coast in New Jersey meant one thing in the summer - The Shore.

Starting off as a youngster, the boy stuff hadn't quite kicked in, but I was already indoctrinated into the tanning thing by the age of seven. With an above ground pool in the backyard in north central N.J. and frequent trips down the Garden State Parkway to Asbury Park and other points on the "Shore" during each summer, I wasn't happy unless I had a nice deep tan... it was sort of a merit badge.

I remember around the age of seven or so, my parents rented a bungalow in the Ocean County hamlet of Ocean Beach. That's where I got my first bad sunburn and some sun sickness, as well. I remember I felt terrible and was shivering and unable to sleep with the pain. The next day I had a huge blister on my shoulder as a memento.

Will Seagers childhood photo
Will Seagers childhood photo

Fast forward a decade or so when my family actually lived at the shore. I guess you can figure I was always tan. Now is when the "Boy Thing” started to kick in. I didn't go to the beach where the rest of my family went. I chose the next town up from us... it had a gay beach. I learned the ropes and the art of cruising pretty fast. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to me, my skin was taking a beating and "remembering” all of the sun I was throwing at it.

Moving along to my Flight Attendant days. Now in my early twenties, I trained in Miami Springs for what used to be Eastern Airlines. No need to say this, but Miami = Sun. Even though my first six months were based out of JFK, I opted for every Florida or San Juan flight that I could get. I particularly loved being dark tan in the dead of winter!

Flight attendant crew in 1972 and Will Seagers Puero polaroid in Puerto Rico at age 21
Flight attendant crew (1972) and polaroid in Puerto Rico at age 21

Next stop San Juan, Puerto Rico! As soon as my first six months were up and I could make my move, I transferred to San Juan. Here, my goal was to attain the tan of a lifetime! (Little did I know that it was more like a life sentence!) Lots of sexy Latino men on the beach, too. All it took was a certain nod and we'd be off the beach and headed to bed! I wound up playing too hard in P.R. and losing my job. I was having too much fun and missed a couple too many flights! Oh well!

Back up north to NYC (and a summer on Fire Island!). Fire Island was my first experience with nude beaches. Boy, did that make things easy! Lol. But I left the NYC area in the fall to help a friend in Phoenix. It had a neat gay community and WOW, the Desert Southwest Sun. It was just about as powerful as it gets!

Will Seagers on Fire Island beach in 1976 and in the Arizona desert
Fire Island beach (1976) and Arizona desert

Then there was the migration to San Francisco, where I lived for fourteen years. Although one could get a pretty good bronzing up on their rooftops, like I did in my apartment, it was the Russian River and its resorts that beckoned. So, for the first few years, every Friday was the hour and a half pilgrimage north to The Woods or many of the other Russian River Resorts. Great California Sun and lots of wild sexy places to visit! And when in town during the winter, there were the tanning salons. It was from overuse of a tanning bed that I got a Malignant Melanoma! Should have stopped there, right?

After returning once again to the East Coast in 1991 to N.J. and ultimately NYC, I discovered a little gem of a beach just outside the waters of N.Y. on the Jersey shore - Sandy Hook - and it was a nude beach! Yay! For where it was and what it was (a state park), it was the wildest beach that I have ever experienced. All sorts of bodies in all levels of arousal.

And what kind of beach story would be complete without the addition of South Beach, Miami Beach, Fla? By this time, I was 44. It was an international port of call. With that came some extraordinary beauties... and raring to go! I remember walking the beach in my favorite black speedo and being summoned by this gorgeous, long haired Adonis to come up to his beach front house. I still get out of breath remembering that one! But wait, there was more. Here I am again, walking the beach in my favorite little speedo, and what had to have been the most spectacular specimen of mankind walked right up to me, gave me a peck on the cheek and started rubbing my crotch. In broad daylight, we had sex on the beach. "Mr. DeMille" - where were you? We were quite ready for our close up!

Will Seagers in the '90s
40th birthday in S.F., on a cruise (1990), South Beach (1996)

Ok. Fast forward through nearly twenty-five more years of sun recklessness to the (sort of) moral of the story. At age 71, I have just undergone my sixth Mohs Procedure for skin cancer. I have not forgotten my fabulous times on the beach. And, neither has my skin. The one thing I have to share with everyone it is this: the sun is not your friend. Please be careful.

Will Seagers bandaged after a Mohs Procedure
Recovering from a Mohs Procedure, past and present

 

Thank you to Will Seagers for use of his photos.

 

Bio of Will Seagers:

Will Seagers (also credited as Matt Harper), within his multifaceted career and participation in numerous gay communities across the country in the '70s and '80s and beyond, worked as a print model and film performer. He made iconic appearances in releases from Falcon, Hand in Hand, Joe Gage, Target (Bullet), J. Brian, Steve Scott, and more, including in lead roles in major classics like Gage's L.A. Tool & Die (1979) and Scott's Wanted (1980). He brought strong screen presence and exceptional acting to his roles and was scene partners with many fellow legends of classic porn.

 

Will Seagers, present day image

 


You can read Will Seagers' previous blogs for Bijou here:
Welcome Matt/Will
What's For Dessert?
On and Off the Set of L.A. Tool & Die
Wanted, Weekend Lockup and Weekends in Hermosa Beach
Honeymoon in the Palms
Birds of a Feather
The Stereo Maven of Castro Street
The Pass Around Boy
The Ecstasy and the Agony
Fitness and Fantasy: The Early Gyms

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Fitness and Fantasy: The Early Gyms

By Will Seagers

 

I remember always admiring those built young  men when I first started cruising Christopher St. and going to Village bars and clubs. There was no doubt in my mind - likes attracted. So, "Gymming" had to become a part of my life.

My first experiences were "Health Spas" and the good old YMCA. The health spas offered pretty good workout equipment. But, they were more family oriented and had no sexual undercurrents. One thing that I noticed about the Ys was the additional activity going on in the wet areas. I could hardly wait to finish my workout and get to the showers! Lol.

During my stint as a steward for Eastern Airlines, I always opted to go off on my own on layovers when possible. This was particularly true when I flew between NYC and Montreal. L'Aero - Navette was the name of this shuttle flight. I spoke French and made the inflight announcements... usually with some chuckles form the French Canadian passengers. It seemed nobody could figure out what my accent was! Lol.

 

Eastern Airlines plane in flight

 

Anyway, Montreal was one of those cities where I stayed at the Y. It was smoking hot! I was especially drawn to the burly dark haired Canadian lumberjacks! They never failed to deliver the logs.

Fast forward to my arrival in San Francisco in the mid 70s, the Y came to the rescue again! Being new to town and not yet acquiring a gym membership, I made frequent visits to the branch downtown. I was most amazed at how brazen people's approaches were! Lots of grabbing and groping were to be had!

I don't remember what brought me to The Pump Room, one of the earliest gay men's gyms, but I sure made a home for myself there! It was a modest storefront location just above Church St. on Market St. It had two partners, Lee and Bob. The first was the primary partner and a very flamboyant type. The latter went on to partner with two other folks and create The Muscle System - AKA The Muscle Sisters.

I really liked the feel of the place and asked for a job. I was at a high point in my porn career, was recognized and was hired. I got hit on by a lot of the members and developed a thick skinned "attitude." Some members complained. But, I did my job, helped train new members on the equipment and was a recognized asset to the business. So, Attitude and all, I remained part of the staff for three years.

I mentioned that one of the owners was flamboyant. And, I should also add very talented at pageantry. There were festivals held at the San Francisco Civic Center called the Beaux Arts Balls - an annual event. I was asked to participate in several of these major costumed events. Lee was very clever with design. He made himself up in a huge blue plexiglass diamond. Along with several other buffed members of the gym, we "linked' together with Lee to form The Hope Diamond and its silver chain. It was very well done and garnered awards.

 

San Francisco Civic Auditorium exterior and interior

San Francisco Civic Auditorium exterior and interior

 

Perhaps the most vivid memory of these Beaux Arts Balls was one where we came as the signs of the Zodiac. Lee was the Sun. And, once again gym members were recruited and made up the twelve signs. Even though it wasn't my sign, I was given a very fetching costume of a Centaur - Sagittarius - complete with bow and arrow! Lee had crafted the rear, horse half of the centaur from chicken wire covered in purple (Sagittarius' color) velour with the horse feet on castors. I strapped it to my butt and it blended with my purple leotards. It was a knock out costume. When we presented ourselves on the runway, we were met with cheers and screams. Due my recognition in the porn biz, this spectacular costume and a little extra bravado on my part, the place went nuts as I was announced and I trotted down the runway with this horse's ass attached to me. I certainly didn't mind be a Sag for a night!

 

Will Seagers in glitter body paint

"Pump and circumstance"

 

The gay gym topic is a huge one for me. More to come au future!

 


Bio of Will Seagers:

Will Seagers (also credited as Matt Harper), within his multifaceted career and participation in numerous gay communities across the country in the '70s and '80s and beyond, worked as a print model and film performer. He made iconic appearances in releases from Falcon, Hand in Hand, Joe Gage, Target (Bullet), J. Brian, Steve Scott, and more, including in lead roles in major classics like Gage's L.A. Tool & Die (1979) and Scott's Wanted (1980). He brought strong screen presence and exceptional acting to his roles and was scene partners with many fellow legends of classic porn.

 

Will Seagers, present day image

 


You can read Will Seagers' previous blogs for Bijou here:
Welcome Matt/Will
What's For Dessert?
On and Off the Set of L.A. Tool & Die
Wanted, Weekend Lockup and Weekends in Hermosa Beach
Honeymoon in the Palms
Birds of a Feather
The Stereo Maven of Castro Street
The Pass Around Boy
The Ecstasy and the Agony

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The Ecstasy and the Agony

By Will Seagers

 

The decision to leave San Francisco and return home to the East Coast in September of 1991 came from great fear and sadness. My "City by the Bay" had been home to me since 1976. But, life was closing in on me and I needed to reinvent myself (i.e save my life!).

In September of 1989, my partner Tom passed from complications of AIDS. We had been together for almost all of my time in SF. I watched the grim reaper take Tom from me over a torturous five year period. During this time, I coached myself on how I was going to make it through this and make a new life for myself after he passed. Although I remained strong for him and by his side, I crumbled like a sandcastle hit by a wave the day he passed.

To put it mildly, escapism took over. I used almost everything I could to stay high and away from reality. "Sex, Drugs and Rock 'n Roll" isn't just a saying - it became a lifestyle! I couldn't come home to the little apartment that we had for thirteen years anymore. It haunted me... too many memories.

 

Will Seagers in San Francisco

 

I went through several apartment changes in SF... none of which worked. I needed to be by myself... to collect myself.

The last place I stayed was a room rental. The house owner was a casual friend and a coke dealer. Although he was very kind and understood my dilemma, I wound up pushing his product towards the end. That's when I knew I had to leave.

I contacted my Aunt in New Jersey... a person who had always been an anchor in my life. I asked if I could stay with her 'til I got on my feet. I could sense an anxiety on her part. But, she relented and I drove cross country. I left on Labor Day weekend. I'll never forget my drive down Market St. as I silently said my goodbyes to the city that I had loved so dearly. So, onto the freeway entrance and onto my four day cross country excursion.

I remained in NJ for three years, where I entered the musical instrument business and sold and taught organ and piano. I have always loved music. And, when times were good, I always had a theater organ in my home.

 

Will Seagers in New Jersey

During the piano and organ phase

 

Bored to death in NJ, I sold most of my belongings and started a new adventure in South Beach, Florida. It was quintessentially even more of a gay Mecca than SF. (The year was 1995.) Things have changed substantially. I had more sex than ever... even episodes right on the beach! Yes! Stuff like that really happened. But, that too became hollow and unreal after a while.

 

Will Seagers in the '90s

Being 45 is not so tough in South Beach

 

NYC beckoned. Along with it came some serendipity. I returned on the first weekend of April. I stayed with my brother in Brooklyn while apartment hunting. The serendipitous part - I met my current spouse Alan the very first weekend I went to Manhattan on the dancefloor of the "Roxie" dance club. It was April 4th, 1995. That was the day that the Agony turned back to Ecstasy!

 

Painting

 

Thank you to Will Seagers for use of the photos.


Bio of Will Seagers:

Will Seagers (also credited as Matt Harper), within his multifaceted career and participation in numerous gay communities across the country in the '70s and '80s and beyond, worked as a print model and film performer. He made iconic appearances in releases from Falcon, Hand in Hand, Joe Gage, Target (Bullet), J. Brian, Steve Scott, and more, including in lead roles in major classics like Gage's L.A. Tool & Die (1979) and Scott's Wanted (1980). He brought strong screen presence and exceptional acting to his roles and was scene partners with many fellow legends of classic porn.

 

Will Seagers, present day image

 


You can read Will Seagers' previous blogs for Bijou here:
Welcome Matt/Will
What's For Dessert?
On and Off the Set of L.A. Tool & Die
Wanted, Weekend Lockup and Weekends in Hermosa Beach
Honeymoon in the Palms
Birds of a Feather
The Stereo Maven of Castro Street
The Pass Around Boy

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The Pass Around Boy

By Will Seagers

 

Part of being under the wing of Chuck Holmes, owner of Falcon and many other legendary porn brands in San Francisco, was being in an extended family of "Available Escorts." I have always been a little on the naïve side... taking things at face value... not a good way to be in this multi-faceted industry. I had no idea that I was up for "grabs" for the right price and for a very discreet clientele that did their shopping from a distance.

Because there was no internet back then, "clientele" would either use the movies, magazines or come down to Trinity Place, Mr. Holmes' bar and restaurant, to see what was available. It finally dawned on me when I noticed that I was waiting on and bartending to men considerably older than myself. (Duh.) This was a very clever operation, looking at it in retrospect. The names of those involved will remain undisclosed. But, it shouldn't take too much connecting of the dots to draw some conclusions.

Will Seagers in the 1970s

Will Seagers in the 1970s

 

One of my first episodes took place in the quite well-to-do San Francisco neighborhood of Sea Cliff. A prominent designer/decorator requested my presence as a gift for his lover as well as for himself. The lover was a knock out and was easy to "work" with. The older of the two necessitated me reaching into the same bag of tricks that I used when I was paired with someone in a movie that I was not attracted to. Call it "professionalism"... but, it always got me through. And, I was invited back several times, much to my pleasure. Much of the second visit took place outside at the swimming pool, where another fine pair of gents were recruited. And, bathing suits were not even an option! (I didn't know that I could hold my breath that long under water! Lol.)

Another memorable hire was as a birthday gift. Once again, this was for the younger half of a couple. Unfortunately, this one was a particular disaster! When I entered their posh Pacific Heights Victorian and directed to a bedroom where the fun was to happen, there was a mound of the "white stuff" that looked like the peak of Mont Blanc! With the birthday boy, who was cute enough, I availed myself of some of the "snow." Unfortunately, due to the copious amounts we both had... I could not perform for him or with him. Lesson learned. No white stuff while working! Lol.

THE most memorable of my escort episodes was with a very prominent poet of the time who lived in L.A. I flew down a few times and had a good enough time, myself, to validate the return trips. Although I have never been rich... money was really the icing on the cake. I enjoyed the adventure of it all!

OK. So, here's that most memorable episode. I got a call from my L.A. poet asking me if I would like to be flown to NYC to the opening of a night club/disco... Studio 54. Keep in mind this was opening night, so all of the legend and fanfare had not yet had the chance to kick in. Loving adventure and the company of this client, I said sure!

 

Big crowd at Studio 54

Big crowd at Studio 54

 

I am a little foggy on some of the details - being decades ago - April 26, 1977! One thing I do remember was not being able to get in. My host was nationally and internationally known... and, I wasn't too hard to look at, either! Well, who walks up the runway to the front door but Cher - and in all of her costumed glory! Little did I know that my host and Cher were friends. Next thing I remember is my host yelling out, "Hey Cher, who do you have to fuck to get in this place?" Cher looked over and signaled us to come over and join her. And, with that, my host was on one arm and I was on the other. That's how you enter Studio 54!!

 


Bio of Will Seagers:

Will Seagers (also credited as Matt Harper), within his multifaceted career and participation in numerous gay communities across the country in the '70s and '80s and beyond, worked as a print model and film performer. He made iconic appearances in releases from Falcon, Hand in Hand, Joe Gage, Target (Bullet), J. Brian, Steve Scott, and more, including in lead roles in major classics like Gage's L.A. Tool & Die (1979) and Scott's Wanted (1980). He brought strong screen presence and exceptional acting to his roles and was scene partners with many fellow legends of classic porn.

 

Will Seagers, present day image

 


You can read Will Seagers' previous blogs for Bijou here:
Welcome Matt/Will
What's For Dessert?
On and Off the Set of L.A. Tool & Die
Wanted, Weekend Lockup and Weekends in Hermosa Beach
Honeymoon in the Palms
Birds of a Feather
The Stereo Maven of Castro Street

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