BijouBlog

By Josh Eliot 

In 1990, Scott Masters was finally ready to put Matt Powers in front of the cameras again for his next big star vehicle movie. There was a lot of hype, mostly from Scott Masters, about “Jimmie’s return.” Jim was Matt’s real first name. We were under no illusion that things would run smoothly on this project, because when Scott Masters was in the director’s chair, things were always twice as hard. Lest you forget my previous blog, “We Waited 8hrs for a Cum Shot. Is That a World’s Record?” Scott Masters and Matt Powers were in a dysfunctional relationship and the crew saw first-hand how bad things could get between them. I should preface this by saying the GM at Catalina basically forced Matt Powers to make this movie or else his days of being financed by the company would end. He was probably the most expensive exclusive the company ever had, because his expenses were covered all the time he was “not shooting movies.” The crew and I thought of him as Scott Master’s concubine. It wasn’t like Matt was a pain in the ass or anything, he was actually a really cool guy. The real problem was that Masters treated Matt like a child, micromanaging all his behaviors and even forcing him to wear identical shirts when they would go to porn industry functions. Scott was obsessed with him and didn’t want to share him with anyone and was actually very uncomfortable when Matt was sucking dick or fucking a hot ass in front of him. It made us uncomfortable to shoot the scenes, seeing Masters discombobulated, and he always had to go up to him and be affectionate after each take.

Okay, so the story is set up, and we are now ready to start this big, honking overpriced project. A lifeguard chair and fake backdrop was rented for the box cover (which is beautiful, by the way) and was photographed in an L.A. studio. Then we took off up the California Coast to Morro Bay and Pismo Beach. Things started off smoothly, the drive was nice, lunch in Morro Bay was civilized and then we arrived at the beach house rental.

I was actually very impressed that Scott Masters had the budget to get us a beach house right on the sand! Not that you ever see that in the finished movie. Albeit small and not very nicely furnished, it was an actual beach house on the beach. I didn’t even care that photographer Jeff Burton and I had to share a room that happened to be the laundry room with two twin mattresses on the floor. Upon arrival, we immediately set up to shoot a sex scene between Matt Powers and Ted Cox in possibly the ugliest room in the house. I might have shot it on the beach, since it was so desolate, but totally the director choice. Not really a “What the fuck?” moment.

The oral went okay, then we started with the fucking and Matt was having hard-on problems. By this time, we were all tired from the drive up from L.A. and we wished this scene had been scheduled after a good night’s sleep. After getting nowhere with the fucking, Matt Powers told Scott Masters that he needed something to eat, the hunger was keeping him from getting hard. I’m not sure why, but our producer/director hadn’t accounted for the fact that we needed food on the set. I assumed his vehicle was filled with groceries like we always pack before heading out. Well, it wasn’t. I suggested that we keep shooting and have some pizza delivered. Masters bit my head off, yelling back: “Jimmie’s Hungry! He’s on a special diet, he can’t eat pizza!” He decided that he and Matt Powers would make a shopping list and Jeff, the make-up man, and I would go to the nearest supermarket. So typical. I think Scott Masters somehow always got off on delaying shoots and dragging things out. This was my first real “What the fuck?” moment on this movie. Luckily, good ol' Jeff had a bag a weed with him. We both walked out onto the beach and got stoned while they made their shopping list. Once we finished the joint, we looked around and said why the fuck are we shooting in that tiny ugly room when we have this secluded beach all to ourselves, without another soul in sight?

The scene finally resumed after we shopped, ate and smoked more weed without Masters finding out. Matt Powers did realize we were sneaking out and getting stoned, and he followed us. All it took was a few hits of our joint to get “Jimmie” in the mood, and we finished the scene around 1 am. We were beat and finally got to go to bed in our laundry room/bed room. It was fine as long as we could get some sleep, but don’t you know it around 6 am Scott Masters just had to come into our room, tip toeing, and started loading and running the cum towels into washing machine. I couldn’t believe it, I mean, “What the fuck?” The only time I was more pissed was when he came back and woke us up again by moving everything from the washer to the dryer and starting it up.

The next location was for shooting some B-roll at a marina, where he had Matt Powers jumping on and off a boat, in and out of the water, take after take. In the movie, he was boarding the boat to find smuggled drugs. Jeff leaned into my ear and whispered, “You know, they say that the most polluted water is within the marina, because of the all the boat fuels.” I thought, “Eww, what the fuck!” It actually made me think of another “What the fuck?” moment on a Chi Chi LaRue movie we shot in Palm Springs. Chi Chi had the model, in a public jacuzzi, obviously filled with “jizz,” open his mouth underwater, get a mouthful, then spit the water on his co-star’s ass. Over and over again! Jeff was with me on that shoot, as well, and we were both gagging.

Finally, the big fight scene on a secluded cove. Scott Masters told me that we were going to load our equipment in this rubber motorboat, the boat owner would take it over to the cove and we would meet him there. I didn’t want to load the video equipment onto the boat, and we got into an argument. He kept saying the path to the cove was too steep to carry the equipment down, but I held firm. It was grueling carrying everything down the cliff, but all the models helped and we finally made it, generator and all. We started setting up the lighting and cameras, when we saw the motorboat arriving with its headlights on. Suddenly and without warning, when it got close to the shore it flipped over. That would have been a disaster if all our equipment was on that capsized boat. What the fuck!

It took a layer of flesh to finish this movie, which ended up being Matt Powers' last with Catalina. They fought constantly throughout, as expected, and it really didn’t deliver the punch it should have at the “box office.” The supporting cast was just downright weird; for example, a young long haired blond, looking around 18, played the head of a cartel. Just weird shit-casting. But the strangest thing didn’t happen on the set - it was on the drive home. Just as we were leaving Pismo Beach and about to get on the exit to the freeway, we saw a hitchhiker. He was bearded, disheveled, psychotic looking and his outstretched arm, to “hitch” for a ride, had a hook on the end of it where a hand normally is. I mean, “Seriously, What The Fuck!” He had about as much chance of scoring a “ride” as Lifeguard On Duty had of being a smooth, successful shoot.

Last Monday night, I met up with Jeff Burton to celebrate his 61st birthday and the release of his new Louis Vuitton Fashion Eye book entitled Las Vegas Jeff Burton. All photos by Jeff. Most of the original Catalina Crew will be there, including Brad Austin, Tony Fontana and Peter Romero. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that one of them was going to say “Jimmie’s Hungry” at that restaurant table! Jeff did, and we all laughed our asses off. It was a thrill reuniting with them again, non-stop banter.

Bio of Josh Eliot:

At the age of 25 in 1987, Josh Eliot was hired by Catalina Video by John Travis (Brentwood Video) and Scott Masters (Nova Video). Travis trained Eliot on his style of videography and mentored him on the art of directing. Josh directed his first movie, Runaways, in 1987. By 2009 when Josh parted ways with Catalina Video, he'd produced and directed hundreds of features and won numerous awards for Best Screenplay, Videography, Editing, and Directing. He was entered into the GayVN Hall of fame in 2002.

By Will Seagers

Hello folks! Will (At Large) here with some thoughts and feelings from the past.

First of all, a big Happy Valentine's Day wish to all of you Bijou fans and readers! Although posting time for this blog comes a little after the fact, nonetheless I am writing this right smack in the middle of Valentine's Day! I hope you all are or will be having a warm and cozy time with those near and dear to you!

Lying in bed this morning in the haze of just having awakened, I wanted to prowl that foggy state to think of what to convey today. The men that kept coming into my memory were my Gemini loves! Not that I haven't had great relationships with those of other signs, it was just too obvious that these guys and their signs stood out! Astrology has been a love and study of mine since the age of 18. And, NO the first thing I ask someone is not, "What's your sign?!" Lol. As a story teller, I just look back and assemble my mental and emotional notes as accurately as possible. Not only have I met and had significant relationships with men born under this sign, but astonishingly right down to one day... May 22nd!

My first 5/22 love was a big and burly man, Roger, whose physique caught my eye on the dance floor of the Ice Palace in Cherry Grove, Fire Island in 1975. Our "dancing in bed" was only matched by our dancing on the dance floor! That summer on Fire Island, whether in the Pines or the Grove, we became a recognized "thing" every time we came out to party. People actually backed away and gave us a little extra room for our (appreciated) dance antics! It was Roger who planted the seed for my moving to San Francisco. He moved there in 1975 and I followed in 1976. My move there was aided by the assurance of a job provided by the owner of Falcon Studios, Chuck Holmes.

So, here we are in 1976 where I'm working my first season for John White at his Boatel/Blue Whale complex in the Pines. I was secretly infatuated with his chiseled good looks. He had recently retired from being one of New York's top male super models. Little did he know that I enjoyed basking in his limelight! This was all a fantasy for me... nothing ever came of it. Oh, and did I mention that his birthday was May 22nd!

Now, staying in that same year, 1976, I took a leap of faith and moved to San Francisco with a troop of my Fire Island work comrades. It was here where I met Tommy (yep, another 5/22!). This was the sweetest set of coincidences! I met him at the bar and restaurant, Trinity Place. It was owned by Chuck Holmes and was one of the jobs that was used to lure me to San Francisco. Tommy was adorable with beautiful brown eyes you could get lost in. I found out in short order that he was a devout Will Seagers fan. After gifting me with a beautiful gold chain and a lovely dinner, we went back to his place and tore things up! That one night blossomed into 13 years! Soon, I found out that he met Roger through a common love of opera. (This turned out to be another 5/22 trait that they also shared with John Whyte!)

Although not born on May 22nd, two more loves of my life were born in the season of Gemini. And, these two men I shared with all of you readers and viewers! I am talking about Jim Bentley and Richard Locke. There was a similar thread to meeting the two of them. We had the pleasure of jumping the gun and getting together before our "screen work!" Believe me, by the time we were in front of the cameras there was no loss of spontaneity. We interacted with the prior knowledge of what a good a fit we were! LOL!

I think that showed with Richard and me on the set of L.A. Tool & Die. It turned out that I got a bit more involved with Jim. We had a lot of similar interests - particularly birds. We both had Moluccan Cockatoos! I had one and he had a pair.

We were in a pretty torrid affair for a while. Me being his senior by a few years, I can actually remember him wearing me out! One thing that I picked up over the years with my Gemini "buddies" is that even if the lust diminishes, the friendship remains.

So, these were "The Days of Our Lives." Some of my cherished and wonderful memories. And, I am very happy to have conjured them up for for all of you on this day of AMOUR!

Bio of Will Seagers:

Will Seagers (also credited as Matt Harper), within his multifaceted careers and participation in numerous gay communities across the country in the '70s and '80s and beyond, worked as a print model, film performer, and DJ, just to name a few. He made iconic appearances in releases from Falcon, Hand in Hand, Joe Gage, Target (Bullet), J. Brian, Steve Scott, and more, including in lead roles in major classics like Gage's L.A. Tool & Die (1979) and Scott's Wanted (1980). He brought strong screen presence and exceptional acting to his roles and was scene partners with many fellow legends of classic porn.

Will Seagers, recent photo

By Josh Eliot

Arguably the best movie director William Higgins ever made was the bestselling hit Big Guns. Released in 1987, it quickly became the movie to see and to share with friends. Big Guns was the winner of Best Gay Film at the 1987 XRCO Awards and honored again in 2003 at the Grabby Awards for Best Classic Video. The lead, and featured constantly throughout the movie, was Mike Henson. The A-list co-stars include Jeff Quinn, John Davenport, Kevin Williams, John Rocklin, Chris Gray, Mike Ryan, Jeff Boote and Rocky Armano. The two other co-stars, Chad Douglas and Kevin Wiles, had the “show-stopping” scene that, at least in our San Francisco flat, was played, rewound, played again and rewound over and over again. Freeze frames sucked on a VHS machine, so you could never really use that as an option to fantasize over. I’m pretty sure I remember being pissed that the rental tape had creases throughout that scene from other renters, prior to us, doing the same wind and rewind. Big Guns was a defining moment for Catalina Video as a company and the wave continued with its sequel, Hot Rods: The Young & The Hung 2. I started working with Catalina Video in October of 1987 and was very well aware of who they were as a company and the history of William Higgins' work, thanks to my local video store on 18th and Castro. I literally felt like I hit the jackpot when Dan Allman (Cameron Leight) told me exactly what company was hiring me. Something left out of the conversations in my two previous interviews with Scott Masters and John Travis before getting their blessing and having a final interview with Dan. Talk about not feeling worthy!

I slowly got used to life on the set. In the beginning, we were not pumping out two to three movies a month like we did starting a few years later. I continued my job as an insurance claims adjuster and got Norma, my manager, to agree for me to have days off when Catalina booked me for shoots. She and her husband owned a franchise video store called National Video and she was just as thrilled as I was when I told her I got my dream job to work in video production. Of course I never told her it was porn; she would not have been on board with that. I told her that tired old story I felt the need to tell time and time again - that I was working on corporate training videos. It worked and she made the accommodations for me. Of course, it didn’t hurt that I got all the employees to throw her a 20th anniversary surprise party to celebrate her time with the insurance company. I got her consent a few days later. I know how to time things! So shoots were sporadic, maybe a few days a month. After getting a few movies under my belt and starting on second camera, Catalina asked me to work at the studio in between productions with Dan Allman for a salary instead of day-pay. I accepted and before we knew it production was increasing. Scott Masters would schedule at least two scenes for two different movies for every set that we built. For example, we built a shower for The Young Cadets and also used it for Black Force, a biracial movie.

In 1988, John Travis made a movie with one hell of a cast called My Best Buddy. This year, My Best Buddy is celebrating it’s 35th Anniversary. To celebrate it and my memories working on it, I cut a little PG trailer for my YouTube Channel and Instagram. Here’s the link if you’d like to check it out.

Dan and I spent a few days putting together a woodsy set. We went to Golden Gate Park and got lots of greenery from the ground as well as fallen tree limbs. We also worked out a deal to rent trees from a local nursery. The set looked incredible; with our night back drop, it came across as very realistic. We shot a scene for Dan’s movie Black Force, which he directed under the name Freddy Murphy instead of Cameron Leight; you know, different era.

A day or so later, John Travis showed up with Doug Niles and his co-star, none other than Big Guns lead Mike Henson. We were never told in advance what models were flying up from L.A . with the directors and this was the first real “star sighting” for me. I knew him from Big Guns, but also In Hot Pursuit, Hot Rods: The Young & The Hung 2, Full Load and Bad Boys Club. It really felt like porn royalty was walking through the door. It turns out he was one year younger than me, born in 1963, and could not have been more down to earth and friendly. He and Doug Niles really hit it off and I was suddenly shown what a real performer behaved like on the set. Totally into the scene, bonding with his partner and knowing how to work a camera. Very little direction needed except for repeating some actions to get different angles. I was lucky enough to work with him again when I directed Sailor in the Wild 2 in 1990 and Powertool 2, co-directing with Chi Chi LaRue in 1991. If you remember, Powertool ends with Jeff Stryker cruising Mike Henson across the street. In the sequel, we opened the movie with Stryker cruising Mike Henson, but replaced the shots of Mike Henson with new ones that we shot, looking a bit older. We intercut it with Styker seamlessly, then he turns and sees Lex Baldwin. Henson bids adieu to Stryker and goes off with Baldwin. (Click this link for a look at the Powertool 2 extended trailer on my channel.) We almost got Stryker for Powertool 2, but negotiations broke down. It’s too bad; I wanted to change his look utilizing a hairy chest and facial hair, but it was not to be.

Another great set that we did not build, but rented, for My Best Buddy was a passenger bus. Kurt Bauer, who I knew from my very first day on the set, and Mike Gregory, who I knew from Young Cadets, were cast for a three-way on the bus. A bus on which, by the way, we also shot a scene for Scott Masters' The Main Attraction and a scene for my first directorial debut video, Runaways. Their co-star was John Davenport, winner of the Best New Stud award at the 1986 XRCO Awards. Another shake-in-my-boots star sighting famous for his giant piece and outrageous cum shots. I remember Dan throwing on a hat and sunglasses when he shot the underneath angle, and he told me to stand back with the fill light or it was going to get a soaking. I first saw him in The Bigger They Come, then Big Guns, Powertool and Innocence Lost, to name a few. It’s amazing what huge hits he was a part of. He was a lot more intimidating than Mike Henson. I want to say John Davenport was more straight-acting than most gay-for-pay guys and really needed constant direction to pull the performance out. The giant hard dick was not the issue, it was up and ready to go, it was more like the energy level didn’t match that of hot Mike Gregory who was always ready to go and Kurt Bauer who, bisexual himself, really let himself go and enjoyed himself while playing with the boys. John Davenport was on the set again the next year in John Travis’s Powerline in 1989, this time with even lower energy or desire to be there. I’m not sure why, but we never saw him again after that. To round off my first set of star sightings, Mike Ryan, another Big Guns star, showed up one day for the yellow bedroom scene in My Best Buddy with the Young Cadet himself, Chris Williams.

Even though the movie Big Guns really featured a packed cast, the movie My Best Buddy was noted by many for having a top notch cast, as well led by newcomer Doug Niles. Niles is the true star of the movie, and if you happen to watch his scene with Greg Stevens, let me know if you notice the flub. Between day one of shooting their scene and day two, Greg Stevens met some trick in the Castro and didn’t make it back to the “models apartment” that night. He was MIA the next morning and we had to wait in the studio until John Travis contacted us saying he returned, which was sometime early afternoon. Everyone was annoyed and stressed, especially John Travis. It was obvious to all that he had partied all night and whomever he tricked with gave him and extreme punkish haircut. Like a tweaker got a pair of scissors and went to town. John Travis was beside himself, breaking his own record of chain smoking. He asked the make-up man (whose nickname was “Wolf-Pussy,” don’t ask me why) to try and make his hair match what it looked like the day before. We even re-shot his close-ups from the day before so it would “kind-of” match! I think we were done with Greg Stevens after that movie. Other than that hideous day, working on My Best Buddy with some real Big Guns was an experience that always stuck with me, as a positive exciting time.

Bio of Josh Eliot:

At the age of 25 in 1987, Josh Eliot was hired by Catalina Video by John Travis (Brentwood Video) and Scott Masters (Nova Video). Travis trained Eliot on his style of videography and mentored him on the art of directing. Josh directed his first movie, Runaways, in 1987. By 2009 when Josh parted ways with Catalina Video, he'd produced and directed hundreds of features and won numerous awards for Best Screenplay, Videography, Editing, and Directing. He was entered into the GayVN Hall of fame in 2002.

By Will Seagers

Hi folks! Will here! It's only been one short month since my departure. I have been itching to get back into writing. I love jogging my memory for all of you...

First off, I would like to thank everyone for their great support and reaction to the "Finale" video I put together with Jules and George. With my friends' help, I think a rather tasty video morsel emerged! Maybe more of them will emerge in the future. One thing we learned - they will need more of a time "cushion" around them as conferring with other creative talents takes more time and organization.

So, here it is the first of my redux blogs. Much like the original blogs they will differ only in when an how often they appear. My guess is monthly. as it is taking longer to dig into my memory banks to furnish you readers with entertainment and facts from the past.

As you can see by the header, the title of this first redux is "The Peter Pan Syndrome - "Don't Wanna Grow Up!" Contained within this title is a question that has haunted me all of my life... "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I have grappled with that question all of my childhood, adolescent years and early adult life without a clear or concrete answer. So, to combat the sheer panic that followed every time I was asked that question, I just decided to remain as Peter Pan - perennially young.

I can't say that I never had a plan... it just never worked out the way I wanted in school! You see, I was actually enrolled in a prominent engineering school in N.J. to study electrical engineering. As I mentioned in a previous blog, I started studies at that school and came out at the same time. Studying engineering required much more discipline than I could muster up at the time. Truth be told, physics and the higher end of mathematics were over my head. All my youth (and to this day), I have had a natural understanding and curiosity of electricity and mechanical things. Unfortunately, that was not enough to get me over the hump of more complicated studies. To this day, I am still building and tinkering with all things electrical, mechanical and audio related. That morphed into selling retail electronics and things of a mechanical nature.

What has gotten me through over the millennia has been my people skills. I was born a natural salesman... it was in my genes. My father had enjoyed a lifelong and successful career in sales. With my gift of gab and being unafraid to strike up a conversation with a total stranger, selling became my default career, as well. Of course, realizing that I wasn't hard to look at made for a good fit, too. I have a direct way with words and a disarming smile that helps to put customers at ease - especially when it comes time to ask them for their money! LOL. So, These skills were what got me through financially in between my films and photo shoots back in my twenties and thirties.

In my forties I realized that things were about to change - a function of aging. The porn industry that had treated me so well in my youth was a bit fickle about the whole topic of age. I decided to bow out gracefully just before my 40th birthday. I had a lot to be thankful for from the prior two decades! But, there was no Peter Pan Syndrome in this business! It was time to lean into my selling and technical abilities.

There seemed to be a recurring redux theme when it came to the jobs I like the most. Twice I did well in retail electronics. First, in San Francisco in the Castro at Eber Electronics. And second at Santa Fe's Candyman - a complex selling electronics, CDs, and musical instruments. Having a bear trap memory and a love of all things electronica, I was a walking Rolodex of models and their technical datum. Both in San Francisco and Santa Fe, I did consultation and installation of home theater sound systems for restaurants, bars and gyms... some of my very favorite endeavors!

Another redux was in furniture. First in N.Y. While at Room Plus Furniture, a made to order company, I learned to do floor plans, and interior design. Then a second opportunity arose in N.M. with a local, well established retailer. Now, with the knowledge of electronics and interiors, I started to mix the two together... much to the delight of a lot of my women customers, who hated having their living spaces cluttered with wires and electronica. It was my goal to hide every wire and make each piece of electronics look like an objet d'arte!

So, this jack of all trades has had a wild ride over the decades - always observing and learning from those around me. Life itself is a school and I have always been, and still am, willing to learn. So, stay young at heart and mind and you will be like me - a Summa Cum Laude in the school of hard knocks!

Bio of Will Seagers:

Will Seagers (also credited as Matt Harper), within his multifaceted careers and participation in numerous gay communities across the country in the '70s and '80s and beyond, worked as a print model, film performer, and DJ, just to name a few. He made iconic appearances in releases from Falcon, Hand in Hand, Joe Gage, Target (Bullet), J. Brian, Steve Scott, and more, including in lead roles in major classics like Gage's L.A. Tool & Die (1979) and Scott's Wanted (1980). He brought strong screen presence and exceptional acting to his roles and was scene partners with many fellow legends of classic porn.

Will Seagers, recent photo

By Josh Eliot

I am writing this on Saturday January 13th, 2024. I specifically blocked out time on this day as it was exactly 25 years ago that my partner (from 1992-1999) Yves-Claude Theriault aka Mark Rutter passed away. When I was pulling photos for my last blog about the Gold Coast Bar and writing about Mark working there, I discovered it was the 25th anniversary. I’ve spoken about our relationship in the past (“7 Years with Colt Model Mark Rutter”), but this time I think it would be special for Mark’s words to do a little story telling. I re-discovered a diary Mark had started to work on but never got to complete. I never thought his words in writing would ever find an audience, but thanks to BijouWorld and this blog excerpts now will. The passages I will share may not read like a story and have a beginning, middle and end like a blog should, but it makes me really happy to give them some life, with an audience.

Mark Rutter was born Yves-Claude Theriault, on October 8, 1951, a French Canadian growing up in Maine. After shooting a photo layout with Al Parker for the Surge Studio magazine Pit Stop, he was introduced to Jim French at Colt Studios and worked exclusively for them in films. Mark passed away at the age of 47, leaving siblings who include his sister Charlene, his brother Rick, nephews Pierre and Jeremy and his Mom. We had his ceremony at The Little Brown Church in Studio City, where celebrities Marlon Brando, Debbie Reynolds and Mickey Rooney were married and the Reagans renewed their vows in 1992. He was cremated and buried over his father’s grave in Maine. Here are some of his thoughts, as written, with only punctuation, spelling and my real name changed, along with a ton of pictures!

*****

I knew I was HIV+ in 1982 without actually going to see a doctor or being diagnosed. Something was going on with my body that let me know I was positive. I can almost pinpoint the day I feel I was infected. It was through intravenous drug use and I knew the dangers at the time but was not very knowledgeable that it could happen to me. I went into denial for 5 years because there was so little help out there and decided to not go on whatever medication was available. People were going through terrible side effects and were still dying left and right. One day in 1987 while walking to work I noticed a small purplish dot on the inside of my elbow. I knew right away what it was, Kaposi Sarcoma, a type of cancer associated with HIV. I freaked out but was not the least bit surprised. I kept it to myself for 3 or 4 weeks and finally told Rick, my brother, who was my roommate at the time. I was still against any medication. I was going to let the process take its course. I finally called my sister and found the nerve to tell her about it. We discussed it at length but I was still determined not to do anything about it. She got very angry with me and said I was being irresponsible.

I decided to go to the Gay & Lesbian Center on Highland Blvd to get tested and be told all my options. Two weeks later I returned for my blood results as instructed. By then I had developed two more lesions on my right arm. A counselor took me in this little room and informed me that my test results were back and my results were negative. My mouth dropped to the floor and I had chills up and down my spine. I said to the counselor, showing her my arm, “Then what is this?” She proceeded to shuffle papers around and her face turned ghostly white. She was very upset and told me that she was looking at someone else’s results. She was devastated and did not know what to say or do next. I told her not to worry, that I had known about my results, and I ended up counseling her.

Mark ended up being referred to a research program for treatment using Tran Retinoic Acid, a derivative of Vitamin A. Eight pills three times a day for one year until the KS went into full remission. In the next excerpt, we jump ahead a number of years. Mark’s brother Rick confessed that he too was HIV+. The two shared an apartment until a falling out over Mark’s partying too much, with his friend Kelly, so Mark moved out. Kelly was a fellow bartender at the Gold Coast and was also dealing coke. Mark was hanging out with Kelly and his partner Don all the time.

*****

I was hanging around my friend Kelly a lot and was doing a lot of cocaine, while my health was getting worse and worse. My T-cells were dropping at an alarming rate. By this time by an act of God I met someone at the Gold Coast and we made plans for dinner. I was a little apprehensive and felt awkward, we were to meet on safe grounds at Rafters (bar) and then go to dinner from there. I asked my friend Valerie and her girlfriend (Michelle) to join us for a drink before dinner. When I walked into Rafters he was there wearing a denim shirt, jeans and a black leather jacket. I was wearing a denim shirt, jeans and a black leather jacket, the only difference was that mine was pressed and starched and his was wrinkled. HaHa. His name was (Josh) by the way. I asked him if he wanted a line and his eyes lit up and he said yes, and off we went to the bathroom. I thought… there goes dinner. We stayed at the bar until closing, by then Valerie and Michelle were drunk and obnoxious. I asked him if he wanted to come over and he answered yes.

The next morning we took showers and he said he would take me to breakfast since we missed dinner altogether. We went off to Silver Spoon, one of the worst places to eat in town, but I was not really bothered by it because something was happening. Shelly Winters was sitting next to us and was yelling and being obnoxious. She needed butter for her fucking toast. After breakfast I drove (Josh) back to his truck which was parked down the street from Rafters. We exchanged phone numbers and promised to call one another.

We started meeting a few times a week for dinner. I was showing (Josh) the fine art of dining and expanding his horizons. He kept my feet on the ground and in control, it was a perfect match. I remember Kelley saying: “If you fuck this up I’ll kill you.” Kelly and Don were very fond of him. I remember we had a date to spend Easter together. I stopped by Thrifty’s and got him an Easter basket to impress him. Well when I got to his place he had a dozen roses and a box of Godiva chocolates. I felt like a fool with my little basket from Thrifty’s.

One thing led to another and we started dating exclusively. We really got along very well together. It was my first serious relationship since I was a gay man and it felt good. He’s fun to be around and is very compassionate and takes very good care of me. We are complete opposites but complement each other. After dating for a year we started talking about getting a place together. That scared me a little since I had been living on my own since I was 16 years old. I was very good at changing the subject and I managed to avoid it for another year.

It literally took months of being together before I was able to wean Mark off his addiction to Kelly and their cocaine lifestyle. I knew he was a party animal from the start but I wasn’t about to buy into it. I was not into the whole drug as a lifestyle thing and made it very clear from the get go. We cut our visits to their place to once a week, if that, but I’m sure they were doing coke while working their shifts at the bar. I did eventually convince him to look at a great condo in West Hollywood that I strong-armed him into moving into with me, finally conquering his fear of living with a partner. Later that year. Kelly’s partner Don passed away and Kelly ended up moving back home to Tennessee. Shortly after moving there, he was riding on the back of a friend's motorcycle when it went off the road and they both were killed. Mark was devastated, naturally, but by this time his health was better and he stopped drinking and drugging. His HIV was under control and we had a good number of years ahead of us.

When Mark started these writings it was not long before he started having issues with CMV, which affected his eyes. He was let go from the Gold Coast at this time, leading to depression as his failing health got the best of him. Unfortunately, his brother Rick passed away a few years later. I’m just happy to be able to get a couple passages of his words in print somewhere even though they are minimal. I’ve had these writings in a file for 25 years and the timing of this blog could not be more appropriate. Reading Mark’s writings, it was almost as if I could hear him reciting the words. Twenty-five years is a long time ago, but in the case of so many of the adult film and video actors who entertained and aroused us over the years, their performances are eternal. Thanks to companies like Bijou, their work is being preserved, allowing them to live on for future generations to enjoy.

Thank you to Josh Eliot for use of his photos.

Bio of Josh Eliot:

At the age of 25 in 1987, Josh Eliot was hired by Catalina Video by John Travis (Brentwood Video) and Scott Masters (Nova Video). Travis trained Eliot on his style of videography and mentored him on the art of directing. Josh directed his first movie, Runaways, in 1987. By 2009 when Josh parted ways with Catalina Video, he'd produced and directed hundreds of features and won numerous awards for Best Screenplay, Videography, Editing, and Directing. He was entered into the GayVN Hall of fame in 2002.